uncle oyster’s dozen favourite afl footballers who haven’t played for the geelong cats

Is this considered sacrilegious? can someone, who is a footy lover, have favourite footy players from other teams? short answer, yes, yes they can! The long answer is far too convoluted too understand. as a young spat, I did look up to certain players from other teams because i played the same position as they did whilst playing for the mighty seven hills bombers and in later years, the nor-west jets. these are the 12 that stood out for all the right reasons!

Those people who grew up watch AFL in the 1990’s were absolutely blessed to see the greatest players in history in the same era. We had these ridiculous full-forward shoot outs on a weekly basis. Lockett, Dunstall, Ablett, Salmon and Modra were all giving key defenders nightmares! My first experience of playing fullback was at Charles McLaughlin Oval, the home of the Baulkham Hills Hawks and Kookas teams back in 1991. Why do I distinctly remember this you ask? I was an 11 year old playing in the Under 13’s competition and our team were a few players short. This was the day I realised that the Footy Gods were not fair! We were absolutely slaughtered and I vividly remember our team missing both back pockets, which made my job extremely difficult. As I whinged to my parents on the drive home, my father suggested I watched that afternoon’s game on Channel 7 to see how the professionals play that particular position. These were the players who moulded and shaped the player I tried to be.

Glen Jakovich 1991-2004 West Coast Eagles. 276 games an 60 goals

As much as it hurt when the West Coast Eagles pummelled by beloved Catters in the 1992 and 1994 Grand Finals, I couldn’t help but love the way Glen Jakovich dominated at Centre Half Back. His legendary battles with North Melbourne’s Wayne Carey were a sight to behold. At 6’4 and 100 kilograms, he was still extremely mobile for his bulking size. He used his frame to perfection to win the important one on one battles with his opponent throughout his career.

Byron Pickett 1997-2007 North Melbourne Kangaroos, Port Adelaide Power and Melbourne Demons. 204 games and 177 goals.

When you think about someone ironing out opposition players with a viciousness, Byron Pickett springs to mind instantly. His bump was deadly and he left a sea of bodies on the canvas as he attacked the ground ball. When you watched Byron Pickett play, you could feel the impact through the television screens. Pickett also was a dual premiership winner and a Norm Smith Medallist for his majestic display in Power Power’s only AFL Premiership in 2004. As I got older and more grumpier playing as a backman for the Jets, I tried to pull off a Pickett bump as much as I could. Sadly, it didn’t always have the same effect!

Mark Bayes 1985-1998 Sydney Swans. 246 games 174 goals

Wait a minute, Uncle Oyster has chosen a Paddington Bloods player as one of his dozen? I know what you’re thinking readers. Has the Oyster’s Opinions website been hijacked by salty Swans fans, who lost another grand final? As a young footy player growing up in the mean streets of Seven Hills, I was the only boy at Our Lady of Lourdes Primary School who played Aussie Rules. Blinkie, my dad, would get free tickets to watch the Swans play at the SCG. He would bring me along as his “seeing eyedog” and we’ll watch from the old Pat Hills Stand. Mark Bayes was a left footer like myself and he was a magnificent kick. He was vital in rebounding the ball from half-back, deep into the forward line. Due to the small dimensions of the SCG and the fact I was a 7 year old kid at the time, Bayes’ kicks defied gravity! Things like this stick with you! Of course I tried to do the same playing as part of the Back 6 at the spiritual home of the Seven Hills Bombers, Ashley Brown Oval.

Mick Gayfer 1986-1993 Collingwood Magpies. 142 games and 1 goal

As a key defender in the 1980s and 1990s, you must’ve tore your hair out looking at the upcoming fixtures. The matches were high scoring affairs and the defenders were doing anything and everything in their power to contain their opponents. Micky Gayfer was the fullback who very rarely lost one on one battles in his career. He used his footballing nous to his advantage to out maneuver and ultimately, contain his opponent. His spoiling was first class and I feel he didn’t get the recognition he truly deserved particularly as a premiership winner with the Pies in 1990. He just went about his job without much fuss.

Stephen Silvagni 1985-2001 Carlton Blues. 312 games and 202 goals

My first memories of watching VFL Grand Finals were seeing the same two Victorian powerhouse clubs Hawthorn and Carlton face off in consecutive deciders in 1986 and 1987. A young Stephen Silvagni had taken the Mark of the Year in 1987 and that footage was played ad nauseum for the remainder of the VFL season. He was one of the first footy players I remembered watching that could be playing fullback in the 1st quarter and then finish the same match kicking a few goals as full forward. Every young kids loved kicking goals so when I transitioned as a backman out of sheer necessity, SOS still gave me hope that I could sneak into the forward 50 and snag some sausage rolls before making the long trek back to my rightful position as fullback. Also, he kept the great Gary Ablett Snr goalless in the 1995 Grand Final. No wonder he was selected as the AFL’s Fullback of the Century the following year.

Gavin Wangnaneen 1991-2006 Essendon Bombers and Port Adelaide Power. 300 games and 202 goals

Gavin Wagnaneen had to be on this list. He would be considered one of the earliest pioneers of attacking, rebounding footy from the last line of defence. He paved the way for how most successful teams play footy today! He was a pivotal part of the Baby Bombers Premiership success in 1993, and he won the Brownlow Medal in the same season. His ferocity and bravery in key contests were incredible, considering his relatively slender frame. The Rubber Man would later return to play out his career at Port Adelaide Power, where he started his footballing journey as 16 year old n SANFL. Fittingly, he was also a Premiership winner with the Power in 2004, ended the Brisbane Lions quest for a fourth consecutive flag.

Nick Haynes Greater Western Sydney Giants and soon to be Carlton Blues 2012-Present. 221 games and 13 goals

As you may or may not know, Uncle Oyster was a foundation member of the Inner Western Sydney and Canberra Giants. I would hit up the young fellas after another comprehensive flogging to take a selfie with me at the Members functions after the game. To their credit, the young kids at the time always obliged. Nick Haynes was a member of the inaugural team and was their mainstay in defence during his 13 seasons with the club. He has this remarkable ability to read the ball in the ball in the air and he mastered the skill of intercept marking at an early age. I always admired how often he’d repel attacking raids with ease. Even as the Giants were getting slaughtered in their early years, Haynes was the beacon of hope for the 348 Giants fans in attendance at Skoda/Spotless/GIANTS/Engie Stadium. He’ll be sorely missed by the Giants faithful next season.

Luke Hodge Hawthorn Hawks and Brisbane Lions 2002-2019. 346 games and 194 goals

In the words of Wes Mantooth, “… With every inch of me, I pure, straight hate you! but, God damn it, do I respect you!” Hate is a strong words ladies and gents but for me to include a Hawks footy player on this list as a Pivs fans, you know The General was elite! It also helped that he was a left footer like me too. Whenever the Hawks needed someone to step in those crucial moments, #15 would rise to the occasion. 4x Premiership Winner and 2x Norm Smith Medallist suggests that Luke Hodge delivered time and time again on the big stage. He was as skilful as he was tough. You couldn’t help but admire the way we played his footy. He was the courageous and inspirational skipper, who led the Poos and Wees to three consecutive flags.